When you stop being yourself, you enter a mindset that is poisonous to your actions. The resistance towards being yourself acts as a catalyst for the actions that kills your own dreams. You don’t need dream killers anymore because once the dream child in you stops dreaming, you’ve already killed yourself. The struggle then becomes, how to resuscitate and resurrect the life of a person who has been long gone for so many years. Who can you trust to turn to that won’t see you struggling and laugh behind your back? Who will help your correct your flaws before the public sees it? Who helps to bring back to life a dead soul? When a dream child kills their own soul, nobody cares, nobody wonders. Everyone stays focused on self. Everyone begins to work towards selfish gains, not knowing that they are forcing themselves into this hole. They use the burden of others to their maximum benefit to get themselves ahead. Once you’re in this hole you’re no longer a dream child, you become a problem child. For I once was a problem child.
For every situation that could have manifested a superb outcome, the death of Me blocked it all from happening. Not that I meant for that to happen, I just didn’t know I was such a problem and the saddest part was that NO ONE TOLD ME. I was surrounded by so many people, yet, NO ONE TOLD ME. I blamed everything and everyone for what was wrong with me. I complained about everything because I was confused with me. I was in a hole that was deep, dark and lonely. As bad as I wanted out, I couldn’t get out because I never knew I was in there. I stole my own peace, and NO ONE TOLD ME. Were they afraid to tell me or did they just assume that the person I portrayed was who I truly wanted to be?
Whenever there was a gathering, me being anti-social was a problem. Whenever I didn’t like something, me holding it in and ignoring people was a problem. Whenever I suffered lack, no one reaching out to help me, I thought was a problem, but the real problem was the fact that I didn’t help myself. Me not taking heed of people trying to teach me how to help myself, was a problem. Me climbing my own ropes, without proper guidance, was a problem. Not knowing who I was or what I was created for caused problems. Not recognizing who I was supposed to let into my life caused problems. Not being taught how to be a woman was a problem. Not being me and doing what my heart told me to do as opposed to my mind, was a problem. I was my own poison and my venom quieted my song and no one could understand the lyrics, not even me.
I let my circumstance control my actions and I had to change who I was and what I was doing, for me, to get out of the hole. Although it wasn’t the path created for me, it was the path I placed myself and the one I chose to follow, and the damage was already done. Still, NO ONE TOLD ME! This hole is completely psychological, learn to control your thoughts through listening more closely to your heart.
“Why should I feel discouraged and why should the shadows come…why should my heart feel broken & long for Heaven and Home” …
Result:
I had to get myself out of this hole I kept placing myself in. How did I begin to do it? Well they say, “when it rains, it pours.” Every time life poured on me, I used the dirt around my soul and mixed it with the waters of the rain, formed bricks, and built steps, until I was able to walk out of the hole, not allowing myself or anyone place me back in there. Every time I couldn’t accomplish something, I refused to place the blame on anyone besides, Myself. Whenever I couldn’t be where I wanted to be, I accepted responsibility for not having saved enough. Whenever I couldn’t provide for my children, the things my heart desired, I told MYSELF, I didn’t grind hard enough. Whenever I lost something, or something was taken from me, I took the blame for not taking heed to the advice from others that could have helped me avoid the whole situation. Moral of the story I blamed NO ONE, I took full responsibility for what happened due to my own decisions of not doing what my heart desired. When you don’t hold yourself accountable for your actions, you place yourself in this hole. The way you know that you’re back in the hole is the moment you start making someone feel guilty about YOUR ACTIONS, as if they caused the problem, when you know they truly didn’t. When you blame others for your mistakes, you place yourself in this hole. The moment you do it, every time know that it was YOU who didn’t follow your own HEART, and that only YOU are to blame. Not anyone else.
Take Accountability and Responsibility for Your Life & Be Blessed People!!
Invite The Truth 